I came to the conference toward the end in time to hear Josh McDowell. I have never met or heard him before, but am aware of who he is and have worked with many people who have come with Josh to Russia on short-term mission groups. Some of his most popular books include The New Evidence That Demands a Verdict, More Than a Carpenter, Beyond Belief to Convictions. Josh spoke on “The Power and Necessity of Relationship,” in addition to sharing his personal testimony of having been physically and sexually abused. It was not until a year ago that he even told his wife children about this teenage trauma. The Holy Spirit convicted him to do it in order to bring completion to the process of forgiveness and inner healing. Amazed at his story, I want to share with you some of it and hope that you will find it just as powerful as I did.
Relationship forms our beliefs, which forms our values, which forms our behavior, which eventually makes as an individual. We are hardwired to connect to other people. We must develop loving and intimate relationship with our children. The power of relationship is so clear when you look at statistics. If a child is raised in a complete family and has a good relationship with his mom and dad (stressed here because most children do not have that kind of relationship with their dads) he has only a 6% chance of ending up in drugs, crime or violence. Furthermore, a child can handle stress at an older age much better if he/she was raised in a loving, caring and intimate family, including a close relationship with the father.
Relationship should be just as important in our lives as it is for God because He is passionate about His relationship with us. When you try to communicate the gospel without relationship it will be very challenging because our faith is not just true, but also relational and meaningful. 1 Th. 2:8 says, We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God, but our lives as well, because you had become so dear to us. Thus, how we communicate the gospel is just as important as what we communicate. More than 70% of non-Christians do not want to have anything to do with Christians before they even talk to you because they think that Christians are judgmental, hypocritical and legalistic.
We as Christians must build the relationship before bringing the truth because without it most of the time the truth will be rejected. In addition, we must love people with genuine love. This is what non-Christians will understand. Jeremiah 31:3 says, The Lord appeared to us in the past, saying: “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving kindness.”
Josh also shared one story that happened to him and hopefully I can summarize it correctly. He was visiting a university in Phoenix, AZ. There were over one thousand students that came to listen to him. He spoke to them outside on the grass and there was no stage setup so he stood on two boulders so that everyone could see him. Before Josh spoke at that university he was warned that frequently there was a group of rockers and punks who come to the campus to protest against religion. Josh basically said, "I am ready to face them.” Sure enough, just as he began to speak, a group of six punks came to him. Josh continued to share his message, but he shifted his message toward those punks and he faced them for the entire time. They just stood there frozen, listening to him. At the end they came to him and asked if they could hug him. Josh said yes and as each punk was hugging him one by one they were crying on his shoulder and Josh was whispering, “I love you.” When these punks heard this they began to weep even louder and told Josh something, “Mr. McDowell, our fathers have never hugged us and have never said, "I love you.” When I heard that it made me cry and it is so true what Josh was saying earlier. The relationship between a child and a father is very important and fathers must hug their children and constantly tell them, "I love you." The relationship with our earthly father is just as important as it is with our Heavenly Father.
Thus, my encouragement for you is to build a relationship with your children if you do not have one because the time will come when it will be late too build such relationship. If your child never had the relationship between his/her father then when he/she grows up he/she will have an identical relationship with their children because children follow the role model that they had. If their role model was practically nonexistent it will be the same for the next generation. Do not let that happen and learn from the mistakes of your forefathers.
I pray for deep, committed and living relationship with your earthly fathers just as you would with your Heavenly Father.
Blessings, Alex




